Today is Plan a Solo Vacation Day. When most people think of vacation, they envision family on the beach, girlfriends on a cruise, or a mountain getaway with their significant other. What if I told you that solo travel can be unrivaled in enjoyment and self discovery? It can also lead to the absolute most amazing, liberating experiences of your lifetime.
I’ve had so many people discourage me from traveling alone over the years. Older women always say they won’t even eat alone in a restaurant. They can’t imagine walking into a hotel alone. Men like to tell me how dangerous the world is for a female to be out alone and often share ways to dress, travel and look alert so I’m not an easy target for unscrupulous men. It always makes me wonder why they don’t work on shaming other men for being terrible rather than making me feel bad for wanting to live my life.
Once in a while, I encounter someone who looks at me with wide eyed wonder and exclaims that they’ve always wanted to go somewhere by themselves but wouldn’t know where to start. If you’re that person, here’s where you start.
You start close to home. Go to a nearby town, somewhere with a nice downtown just an hour or two away. Look for a place that has a lot of nice shops or a great restaurant or museum. Park your car and take a walk. That’s it.
Take a walk. What do you see? A nice store? Go inside. Browse while you talk to the shopkeeper. Buy something and ask the proprietor about the origin of the product you’re buying. Or don’t buy anything and just have a friendly conversation. The point of this exercise isn’t to spend a lot of money so much as it is to interact with the world without the safety net of someone you know. After all, if you have a friend along, you’ll talk to them rather than strangers and maybe miss out on something fabulous.
Now go into a restaurant or a bakery. Order something yummy. Sit and enjoy it. Chat up your server. Make eye contact with another diner and smile. Play on your phone or just sit quietly and enjoy your own thoughts.
Keep going on your walk and look closer. Start to notice the cool architecture. Is that a mural down that street? Look at all the beautiful flowers the city has planted. Pay attention. Engage with a stranger. Absorb your surroundings and be excited about the possibility there’s something cool around the next corner.
Maybe there is, maybe there isn’t but the mere possibility is enough to keep us searching,
And that there, my friends, is what travel is all about. It’s about the search for something different than what you know, for something you haven’t seen before, or for something familiar that’s lost to you in your daily life.
Make that first solo expedition a short one. A day trip will do fine or stay overnight. Don’t overcommit. Leave yourself wanting more. Make it so you are sad to go home and excited to plan that next journey.
As for that next journey, choose somewhere with lots that interests you and get started on your research. Do be smart. Research your destination for safety and affordability. Don’t book a nonrefundable hotel room for five days when your destination should have been a weekend. That’s a rookie mistake. Ahem. Yours truly did that once and learned a valuable lesson from it. Since then, I have learned to do better research and to build in more flexibility. In fact, my best solo trips have been the kind where I committed to no hotel for more than a night or two and was ready to pull up stakes and head down the road.
When you travel alone, you learn things you never expected, You encounter people you might never meet when traveling with others. You meet your true self too. You find out that you’re too agreeable when with others or that you truly love a road trip with no plans beyond the overnight bag in the trunk. You learn that it’s ok to take the exit at the last minute because the sign said there’s a donut shop thataway. When with a companion, you often pass the exit before someone decides that donuts are a good idea.
The answer though is that fresh donuts are always a good idea.
You may find that you’re scared sometimes but that’s really just a chance to be brave. And best of all, when you find the courage to be brave, it will be the source of great joy and wonders.
What are you waiting for? Don’t wait for friends or a husband or for anyone else. Plan it and go. And, of course, report back. I’m always looking for inspiration!
My solo adventure this week is Tucson Mountain Park and Saguaro National Park. A big hike today and shorter ones the rest of the time. Reading and writing (I think). Enjoying the desert environment, which I love. Saw a javalina yesterday!
I agree that it’s a good idea to not always book ahead. It can make for some long drives sometimes. I’ve wound up sleeping in the car a time or two! But pre-booking locks you in and that can be a misery, or a financial loss.
That sounds like fantastic fun. Also, I learned something new! I had to google javalina because I had never heard of such a thing!
I have been fortunate not booking ahead but also look ahead to see if it’s a place that lodging might be a problem. If you’re coming to the Hocking Hills, there are times that every room, cabin, rv hookup and piece of dirt where one might throw down a tent will be occupied. I use this place as a cautionary tale! Ha!
I did have to take a chance on this, because the campground is reservation-only and I booked 6 nights. But a good friend has been here.
Time in nature is always a good idea. I hope you make some truly wonderful memories and come back recharged.
What a great day to celebrate adventures!
Yes!!! So many adventures, so little time!!
I’ve only had one solo vacation before, and I didn’t mind it. You’re right that it’s a good way to find out more about yourself. These all seem like reasonable suggestions to ease into a solo trip. You just have to start somewhere, and it helps starting close to home and doing a small trip to see what it’s like. And then go from there.
Yes! It’s surprisingly intimidating for many people so starting close to home or even somewhere familiar is a comfortable way to dip your toe in the water. That’s how I started!
Totally great article and one which is especially true in today’s increasingly chaotic environment. Staying safe is always a priority, and most women are very aware of their environments. I know I am. Myself, I won’t walk into a bar alone, but I almost never go to bars anyway – no interest. But, I do go places on my own a lot and always have enjoyed walking around places by myself. As I get older, I have to accommodate my own needs, and think a bit more about the terrain as well as the fact I am no longer a distance runner (sigh). Independence is important – it keeps at bay dependency and fear as well as increases self-reliance, self-efficacy, and give a freedom of mind and spirit like nothing else can. Thanks for writing this!
Yes! I always pay attention to my surroundings and listen to my gut but have luckily never had any real issues. Although, like you I do tend to avoid bars and other crowded places where trouble often waits.
At the end of the day, the only person you have to rely on is yourself so it really is importantly to maintain your independence and to be comfortable on your own.
Thanks for stopping by and for leaving your thoughts! I hope to hear from you again soon!